It could have been so much worse...

I see stories like this, and I feel grateful to have been diagnosed as "early" as I was (although it felt like a very long time to me).  Many people live with Cushing's for years, and receive much more damage to their bodies.

http://www.today.com/health/after-massive-weight-gain-cushings-disease-diagnosis-saves-mans-life-2D80527683

ACTH Stimulation Test

This morning I had an ACTH Stimulation test conducted at an infusion center.  I am trying to focus on feeling grateful these days for the things that are going well and improving.  So today was an opportunity for that.  I am trying to feel grateful that I was simply at the infusion center to have a test conducted.  It was a room with two nurses and probably 12-15 lounge-type chairs for patients.  People were there getting infusions for all sorts of things, many of them seemed very familiar with the nurses and so were probably there a lot.  I think one of the women had cancer, as she had on a hat.  Another woman was incredibly thin.

It was depressing to be there, to feel like a "patient" - a feeling I am trying so hard to fight - I am trying to just feel normal.  It's a hard emotional balance between giving myself a break and allowing myself to be sick, and trying to be optimistic and celebrate the successes and the indications that I am geting better.

So today, instead of being depressed, I need to focus on feeling grateful that my experience in an infusion center was only for a test, that my disease is curable, and I just need to be patient and give it time.